April 2024: God is love. God is here.

We have all probably heard the expression that God’s love for us is like parents’ love for their children. In less than two weeks we will be celebrating Mother's Day, and then Father's Day in June, when we show our appreciation and love for our parents who are living and pray for and remember our parents who have passed away. Our parents influence our lives significantly, and we take from them their examples of living – what they value, what they celebrate, what they avoid, and other life lessons. Through our connections with them, I believe we feel just a small part of the vastness of God’s love.

 

My earliest recollections of feeling parental love are of laundry day when I was about four or five years old. On that day, my mother and two aunts, who lived in houses on either side of ours, would hang the laundry out to dry in their backyards. When the laundry, which included sheets and blankets, was dry, my mother and aunts would take the blankets and hold them taut by each corner. Before they folded them, I was allowed to jump into the blanket (with my shoes off), and they would rock me back and forth, up and down, as they would recite a nursery rhyme or sing a song. I can still remember the fresh smell of the blanket, the breeze on my face from the motion, and a view of just the deep blue sky as the rest of the blanket enveloped me. I felt safe and loved.

 

At age 13, my father passed away suddenly from a heart attack, and my extended family played a large part in my adolescent upbringing. The youngest of four brothers, with an 18-year age difference between my oldest brother and me, I was a “surprise” to my parents who were both in their 40s when I was born. My brothers always said that I got away with more things than they did because mom and dad were worn out by the time I came along. I never thought so, but then again, I was the center of attention in my family, being the youngest of an entire generation of cousins on my father’s side of the family and the second youngest on my mother’s side. After my father died, I truly felt the love and support of so many members of the family who were always ready to “be there” if I needed something. My upbringing made an impact on the decisions I would make in my life. When I married, my wife and I hosted many family holidays and gatherings, always trying to keep family members together and connected with each other. As the generation of parents, aunts, and uncles who cared for my wife and me grew older, we cared for them in our home, until they passed away. I continue to be grateful for the experiences of living in a multi-generational household and being able to give that experience to our children.

 

The difficult thing about being the youngest of a generation is that you experience often and soon the death of people you love at a young age, and the experience has a maturing effect. The exciting thing about being the youngest of a generation is that we are just beginning to have grandchildren, and all of my cousins have grandchildren who are grown, making our grandchildren a new fun experience for the whole family. It is also very satisfying to see that my wife and I have now passed on our sense of family love and acceptance to our children who are now or are becoming parents themselves. The chain continues – hopefully – for generations to come.

 

The news of the day is unsettling and disturbing with wars and conflict around the globe and polarized thinking in our country around any number of topics. Cutting through all the arguments, the protests, and the noise of everyday life, we hear, “God is love.” It may sound naïve, too simple, even a retro-1970s mantra, but it stands the test of time, and I believe, it is manifested most notably in the family. If we can replicate how we treat our family members with others with whom we interact, we can begin to make change in the world. Treat others as you would like yourself or your children or any person you love to be treated.

 

In 1965, just as the Vietnam war was escalating, a popular song written by Burt Bacharach began with the lyrics, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love; that’s the only thing there is just too little of.” Nearly sixty years later we are saying the same thing, and I would venture to say that we could make the same claim throughout recorded history. We have yet to find a universal and permanent way to “love one another as God has loved us.” 

 

With that historical scorecard, we might be tempted to give up. Then, we pause and take a look at our own children, our grandchildren, young Archmere students – all with exceptional promise who are supported, cared for, and loved. Perhaps our hopefulness can come from the seeds of love we planted in the relationships we have created with these next generations. Completing my 14th year as Head of School and my 26th year of working at Archmere, I feel fortunate to work in a community that has been formed over the years by caring and compassionate families who have made significant sacrifices to choose Archmere for their sons and daughters. In a recent writing assignment, I asked the students in my Norbertine History and Spirituality class to discuss what they thought to be the significant elements of an “Abbey School,” and then asked them if Archmere exhibits those elements. In some form or another, every student commented about the sense of community at Archmere, and some used the phrase “home-like community,” meaning that they felt comfortable, accepted, and supported as they would by their own family. That is highest praise for Archmere, in my opinion, and recharges my optimism about the future for all of us. God is love. God is here.